Sunday, August 7, 2011

Only Girl in the World...

So, this is just kind of a general post today. See, I was out dancing last night with some of my favorite girls....looking all hot with a new periwinkle colored blouse with ruffles and a hot black mini skirt. Just got me some new facial piercings too (lip and redid the eyebrow)...I was looking amazing! I even took photo's of my self last night, because there aren't many days when I look in the mirror and go "Damn girl...you are hot!"

Anyway, we were celebrating a friend's birthday, which was cool. But really my main goal of the night was to find a cute guy to make out with....that's all I wanted....to have fun with my girls and make out with a guy. However, as the night went on and I'm dancing away, I was only approached by two guys to dance and both of them were just blah! That's all I can say. As the night progressed, and more and more long islands got into my system, I started to notice how my friend was being so cute with her boy...you could tell they had missed each other while she was out of town. And I started to get the single's blues I guess.....I started to get really frustrated actually. Even my friend's "manwhore" guy friend wouldn't come over. I tried dancing with him a bit and kind of giving him that eye....you know what I'm talking about...that sexy look you throw across the room at someone when you want them to come over. No such luck!

By the end of the night, I was feeling pretty crappy. I was at that perfect buzzed point where it would have been so fun to let loose with a cute guy and there wasn't one! Then the worst possible thing happened.....Rihanna's song "Only girl in the World" came on!

Bad Bad Bad! This song always makes me think of Roberto, because it was the last song that I ever danced with him to....well I danced around him and he watched me cause he was "tired" (load of Bullshit, because I should have took that as a sign that he didn't love me anymore, since he used to love dancing with me no matter what). Anyway, I distinctly remember him saying, as I danced around him to that song on his birthday weekend, "Whenever I hear this song I'll think of you." Which was yet another sign I should have picked up, but whatever. Anyway, ever since then that song is the ONLY song that still reminds me of Roberto and makes me feel like shit every time I hear it.

So, "Only girl in the world" comes on and I just start bawling on the dance floor. I'm dancing with one of my friends, but she's way too drunk to even notice (which was fine by me....how embarrassing). I was a mess! As soon as the dj changed the song, my moment of tears was over.

We left soon after and I thought I was done with my crying session, but as soon as I got in my car to drive home from my friend's place that DAMN song came on again! Noooooooooooo! Another 5 minutes of crying and wondering what is wrong with myself!

Last night, I felt like I was the Only Girl in the World without a guy in her life....the Only Girl in the World who wasn't getting action....the Only Girl in the World going home from the club crying.

It's been over 7 months since Roberto and I broke up....what the hell is wrong with me?!!!! I need to stop feeling this way and I need to stop now!

Suggestions please?????

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